Hey ladies, are you trying to capture the heart of that special guy who’s into you dressing up like an anime character?* Do you have a spare Japanese school girl uniform in your closet?

If so, then Michelle Phan, YouTube celebrity, will teach you how to look like Sailor Moon. The clip does not include instructions on putting together tentacles, however.

*Yeah, we all know there no chance you are but work with me here.

Japan Sugoi: How to transform yourself into Sailor Moon

Schools in Beijing are doing about a piss-poor job in sex ed as parents in Utah home schooling their teens. Which is surprising, considering the whole one-child-per-family policy in China.

Like the moms and dads who believe the earth is only 4,000 years old and who actually take Sarah Palin seriously, Chinese educators are notorious for sticking their fingers in their ears and singing “Gong Li had a Little Lamb” when the subject of sex comes up.

From Slate:

Jerry Tseng, a friend who works in finance in Beijing, remembers his school’s sex-ed lesson well, but not for what he learned. That day, Tseng said, his teacher forced an assistant—who until then had not taught a single lesson—to lead the class. The younger instructor stood in front of the students red with embarrassment, unable to broach the subject. Eventually, the students were told to read the chapter themselves. This was the pedagogical method favored by many teachers; the dozen or so Chinese people I asked about this all had similar stories.

Oh, and according to Michelle Tsai’s Slate article on the lack of sex ed in the Middle Kingdom, Chinese college girls also like Sex and the City.

I’m sure her followup article is going to be about how men in China secretly mutter, “Fuck those bitches,” when their girlfriends force them to watch it with them.

Slate: Everything You Always Wanted To Know About Sex (But Didn’t Learn Because You Grew Up in China)

I’ve gone on record a number of times expressing my belief that golf is as much of a sport as I am an athlete (read: not very much). It’s a dumb game played with dumber rules (you hit the ball… then you go looking for it).

My suggestions to the PGA have also gone unheard. Stuff like randomly-placed land mines on the green going a long way to make the game more interesting. Tiger Woods would definitely have something to cry and bitch about when his foot’s blown off and finally actually earn his money, IMO.

But a woman’s outfit that turns into mini-green? That would definitely be part of the new golf, after the revolution. It’s from Japan. Of course.

Pink Tentacle: Bra doubles as golf putting mat
Japanator: Take your bra off and play golf with it

… which comes as no surprise to anyone of the male gender. It’s understood. It’s a social contract. But the upside is that with enough money and unlike what Sir Mick Jagger had to say, you can get exactly what you want.

For example: AV idol Maria Ozawa. The Tokyo Reporter checks in with a post about Ozawa working in a brothel, charging 150,000 yen (about $1,700) for a 70 minute session. Ozawa’s an exception to the rule, however, with most AV girls bringing in about $300 to $500.

Surprisingly, the rates for the majority of AV girls who turn tricks on the side also brings them in line with porn stars in the US charging about the same amount on online message boards.

Not surprisingly, the economy and a downturn in their fees are the reasons for the surging interest in female adult performers to “meet” their fans.

The Tokyo Reporter: Maria Ozawa, other acclaimed AV actresses on auction as stagnation sticks

As if having to use a condom doesn’t suck enough, getting something from them would suck even worse. Having them fail and knocking a girl up (because let’s face it, pregnancy is way up there when it comes to STDs) would really suck.

Such is the case with 2 million condoms somewhere in circulation that were sourced from China. The factory that made the rubbers was shut down by Chinese police for making them in unsafe and unsanitary conditions and for using child labor. The condoms were sold under the Durex and Jissbon labels.

So like food, toys and drywall, add condoms to one more thing to worry about if its made in China.

Consumerist: You May Want To Check Your Condoms For A ‘Made in China’ Label

It’s not often that NPR is mentioned in a sex blog, let alone an Asian sex blog, but there’s few white devils that have a real insight into the Japanese underworld.

In this case the gaijin’s name is Jake Adelstein, a former crime reporter for the Yomuiuri Shinbun. During his time Japan, he reported on the sex industry, Yakuza bosses and the relationship between the society at large and its underworld.

The interview by Fresh Air’s Terry Gross is fascination and the excerpt from the book is just as interesting.

NPR: An American In Japan, Investigating The ‘Tokyo Vice’

Some people believe the Japanese fetishize technology — which could be true. But USB-powered boob warmers is more like using technology to serve your particular fetish.

But given the proliferation of saline-filled fake boobs in the valley, such a device could find use in the winter months when those puppies might get cold to the touch. Happiness is, after all, a nice paid of DDs to motorboat.

Topless Robot: Super Terrific Japanese Thing: USB Breast Warmers

Hey kids, do you like iPhones? Of course you do, because if you don’t you must be some kind of communist (but not for too much longer, seeing as how the Chinese are getting the smartphone soon).

Do you like trying to get women naked? Well duh, you’re reading this site. Enter PUFF!, a distinctly Japanese iPhone app that uses the best of the device’s interface to try to get the clothes off women.

Using the power of your own breath, you try to blow or flick the dress off a Japanese gravure idols Yurika Kurosawa, Aki Suzumori and Kana Osumi, The effect is not unlike Marilyn Monroe stepping onto a grate in The Seven Year Itch — and that’s about all you’ll seeing as Apple won’t allow anything resembling nudity on their precious.

Still, it’s a the most interactive and titillating use of the iPhone seen in awhile.

JapanSugoi: Japanese iPhone upskirt panchira app Puff!

The stresses of everyday Japanese life make girls want to fantasize about being in a different place; a virtual adult Disney Land full of costumes, toys and lots of hard cocks. Maids, schoolgirls, army soldiers and even cows, are just a few of the many ways Japanese girls dress up and fantasize about escaping their realities.

Miku Hayama is cute in her everyday clothes, but dressed up like a little maid makes her even more delicious. Her black and white maid uniform is slowly stripped off by her master. She pretends to not like his aggressive nature, but that is just part of playing the submissive maid role. He peels her white panties off and explores her inner workings; first splitting open her thick and very meaty J-lips and then bringing her bright pink clit to attention, while he plows through her fur coated, orange colored slice. Her master’s commands and precision fingerwork get her pussy dripping, as his other finger works her virgin anus into shape. Static electricity has her pubes standing on end, as her master rips through her milky hole and jiggles her big boobies around, before feeding her a large mouthful of his ultra potent J-jizz.

Mayu Yamaguchi is very young with a baby face. She fulfills old men’s fantasies as she dresses in her schoolgirl dress and let them play teacher with her. She has short hair and very studious glasses. Below her shirt is a lovely pair of thick J-boobs with soft, perky and slightly pointy nipple tips. Her flower patterned panties hide a fleshy pink fuck hole that this filled with liquid J-sap, just waiting to get flushed out of her. His fingers come out soaked, as her thick J-cream clings to his hands like glue. She moans and groans as he extracts even more juice from her pussy, before cramming her mouth and fuck hole with his cock. Her tight body sucks his dick up deep, as her skinny thighs ride his rod with young passion. He lays this schoolgirl out for a final lesson in spreading cum wads across her pretty chest.

Makoto Amano is cleaning house as a good little maid for her very demanding master. He comes home and quickly undresses her, leaving only her long black boots and maid hat on. He inspects her pussy and complains of its unkempt condition, before breaking out a razor and dry shaving it clean again. She has a very pretty and very deep planter, that sucks in fingers, cocks, and anything else with ease. It is filled with luscious J-juice that flows freely with very little stimulation. He stuffs her juicy box and rams it hard, before pulling out and spilling a nice one all over her nose and face. He then immediately orders her back to work to finish her cleaning chores!!

Seira Rando’s boyfriend makes her dress-up like an army soldier. She doesn’t only look tough in her uniform but she is more than capable of inflicting discipline into weak army privates. 2 substandard soldiers in her platoon are dressed only in their underwear, as she drops them to the ground and whips them with a belt, making them do push ups while they lick her underwear, ass and pussy. She suffocates the 2 candidates with her pussy before sucking each of their cocks. She forces them both to wash their faces between her sap-soaked legs and then shave her pussy clean with a dry razor. Once the two pathetic platoonsmen are done, her boyfriend gets the privilege of bangin her out, working her over hard before blowing a thick one all over her face. The 2 second class soldiers run in at the end to deposit a load of their own all over her already cum covered face.

Natsuki Iijima invites two male friends of hers over to play with her while she dresses up like a cow. They fondle her utters and play with her large teats. This youngster has a beautiful body; long hair draping down her back, lusciously large J-jugs and a fuzzy pussy too. She giggles and laughs and giggles even more as the 2 guys grope and molest her body. One guy milks her big jugs while the other licks her hairy hole and tickles her for a while, before all the fun comes to an end.

It doesn’t have to be Halloween for these girls to dress up!!!

Now that software developers are hip to the iPhone and its potential for cash and prizes (Write app, hope it passes Apple’s app vetting process, PROFIT!) it was only a matter of time that the adult industry got in on the action. Or at least, do its best to get in on the action, seeing as how Steve Jobs is on record as saying porn will never sully Apple’s most precious of precious mobile devices.

ifukkin is not one of those apps. It sounds like it, but apparently fukkin means abs in Japanese. But there is a girl in a cheerleader outfit to encourage you along while you’re developing your tight, rippling fukkin. So, fuck, at least there’s that.

Gizmodo: iFukkin iPhone App Maybe Is Not What It Seems [IPhone Apps]