Forget gay marriage. The final frontier in convincing holier-than-though fundamentalists that the end times are near is all in the pixels, baby — and by that I mean marrying a video game. Are you sure your buddy loves World of Warcraft or does he love World of Warcraft?
The genesis of this boldly going where no nuptials have gone before? Nana Anegaski, a virtual girlfriend in the Japanese dating sim Love Plus. An unnamed Japanese gamer with Ms. Anegaski, in his Nintendo DS, went to a church in Guam to do the deed. The newlyweds also held a small reception for family and close friends yesterday. I am not kidding, and I do not know if Mario and/or Master Chief were in attendance.
Seriously, if you can marry a video game I have plans on getting hitched to Dazzler in her ’80s-era graphic novel form. If anyone can understand me it’s Alison Blaire, the mutant lovechild of Marvel and Casablanca Records.
…the mousepad or its price, at $52. Wait, it’s definitely the price, as my threshold for all things X-rated is *obscenely* high. Ha ha.
Seriously though, if you’re looking for this particular conversation ender (because there’s not many people that’ll start a conversation over this piece of art from Queen’s Blade), it’s over at J-List.
Hey ladies, are you trying to capture the heart of that special guy who’s into you dressing up like an anime character?* Do you have a spare Japanese school girl uniform in your closet?
If so, then Michelle Phan, YouTube celebrity, will teach you how to look like Sailor Moon. The clip does not include instructions on putting together tentacles, however.
*Yeah, we all know there no chance you are but work with me here.
Schools in Beijing are doing about a piss-poor job in sex ed as parents in Utah home schooling their teens. Which is surprising, considering the whole one-child-per-family policy in China.
Like the moms and dads who believe the earth is only 4,000 years old and who actually take Sarah Palin seriously, Chinese educators are notorious for sticking their fingers in their ears and singing “Gong Li had a Little Lamb” when the subject of sex comes up.
From Slate:
Jerry Tseng, a friend who works in finance in Beijing, remembers his school’s sex-ed lesson well, but not for what he learned. That day, Tseng said, his teacher forced an assistant—who until then had not taught a single lesson—to lead the class. The younger instructor stood in front of the students red with embarrassment, unable to broach the subject. Eventually, the students were told to read the chapter themselves. This was the pedagogical method favored by many teachers; the dozen or so Chinese people I asked about this all had similar stories.
Oh, and according to Michelle Tsai’s Slate article on the lack of sex ed in the Middle Kingdom, Chinese college girls also like Sex and the City.
I’m sure her followup article is going to be about how men in China secretly mutter, “Fuck those bitches,” when their girlfriends force them to watch it with them.
I’ve gone on record a number of times expressing my belief that golf is as much of a sport as I am an athlete (read: not very much). It’s a dumb game played with dumber rules (you hit the ball… then you go looking for it).
My suggestions to the PGA have also gone unheard. Stuff like randomly-placed land mines on the green going a long way to make the game more interesting. Tiger Woods would definitely have something to cry and bitch about when his foot’s blown off and finally actually earn his money, IMO.
But a woman’s outfit that turns into mini-green? That would definitely be part of the new golf, after the revolution. It’s from Japan. Of course.
… which comes as no surprise to anyone of the male gender. It’s understood. It’s a social contract. But the upside is that with enough money and unlike what Sir Mick Jagger had to say, you can get exactly what you want.
For example: AV idol Maria Ozawa. The Tokyo Reporter checks in with a post about Ozawa working in a brothel, charging 150,000 yen (about $1,700) for a 70 minute session. Ozawa’s an exception to the rule, however, with most AV girls bringing in about $300 to $500.
Surprisingly, the rates for the majority of AV girls who turn tricks on the side also brings them in line with porn stars in the US charging about the same amount on online message boards.
Not surprisingly, the economy and a downturn in their fees are the reasons for the surging interest in female adult performers to “meet” their fans.
Soft, bouncy, mushy, squashy, frisky, spongy, perky, buoyant, squishy, bubbly, mammoth, jumbo, massive and ginormous are just a few of the many adjectives used to describe the 100% Natural Boobage on this fresh crop of Hello Titty Volume 6 J-girls.
Meguru Kosaka (Cover Girl) is a huge name on the Japanese big boob scene. Few J-chicks are blessed like Meguru is; short hair, cute baby face, small tight body, soft- warm- sappy J-slice, and a textbook set of incredible J cup J-jugs. She is wearing her school uniform and standard issue loose socks too, as an older man gropes her tits and takes a full sampling of her young and very fresh scent with his tongue. Her big boobies are every man’s focus and this guy works her monster milk jugs over well, while he lightly massages her clean shaven fuck slit. Her hole fills with gooey J-sap, which he swishes around with his finge rs prior to pounding her from behind, top, bottom and finally in mish; before he blows a thick one straight into her mouth.
Mai Haruna has short hair and luscious F cup J-tits. She knew from middle school age that her tits were different than most other girls in her class. Her monster areola dwarf 500 yen coins and her nipples protrude boldly from the middle like two torpedoes ready to launch. Her pussy is overflowing with squirt and requires minimal stimulation to spill out of her. Her pubic patch is furry, black and all natural, contrasting nicely with her overall whiter skin tone. Her thick lips are custom tailored for sucking up cock, as she very erotically licks his wang while massaging her own rock hard nip tips. She understands ho w her deep cleavage can make nice to a hard wiener; nearly bringing our guy to climax as he splits skin and plows through her deep cleavage canyon. She begs for cock inside her furry hole and screams as she gets what she was looking for. Her huge boobies bounce as one of the camera crew cant stand just watching anymore, and walks into the shot from camera right beating off and blowing one directly on her bouncy boobs. Another member of the crew wants some too and squirts another creamy batch on the same spot his co-worker did. She keeps getting fucked, before taking a final bath in cum all over both her tits as well as deep inside her cleavage too.
Haruka Aoyama is a former Hello Titty Cover Girl. Today she returns in a schoolgirl PE uniform, or bloomers, as they are more commonly referred to in Japan. Her pointy nipple tips pop from her white t-shirt as our guy gropes and grapples with her big jugs. Below her pink bloomer bottoms is a super tight virgin anus and perfectly formed puffy pussy. She hardly hesitates to take control of things, flipping our guy around and gnawing out his ass while licking the extremely hairy region between his ball sack and anus. Her vag seepage is very thick and stringy, yet extremely inviting for our guy to visit with up close and personal. The wet J-sludge makes for an easy entry and allows our guy to get her boobies bouncing while ramming her in several positions before blowing all over her neck, face and tits.
Niche is the first Thai girl to make her way into the ranks of the regular Japanese Hello Titty crew. Niche is totally deserving of this honor, as her young face, erotic nature and giant all natural rack gain her entry to the club. Our man fucks her face in the shower after she soaps and suds her entire body down. Her dark eyes and lips stare down on his hard rod, as it quickly disappears deep inside her throat. She hops on top of his knob and rides it bareback in a few positions, before begging for some cum to glob her pretty face up with. She stares into the camera as cum drips from her nose, sugar coating her already perfect tatas.
As if having to use a condom doesn’t suck enough, getting something from them would suck even worse. Having them fail and knocking a girl up (because let’s face it, pregnancy is way up there when it comes to STDs) would really suck.
Such is the case with 2 million condoms somewhere in circulation that were sourced from China. The factory that made the rubbers was shut down by Chinese police for making them in unsafe and unsanitary conditions and for using child labor. The condoms were sold under the Durex and Jissbon labels.
So like food, toys and drywall, add condoms to one more thing to worry about if its made in China.
It’s not often that NPR is mentioned in a sex blog, let alone an Asian sex blog, but there’s few white devils that have a real insight into the Japanese underworld.
In this case the gaijin’s name is Jake Adelstein, a former crime reporter for the Yomuiuri Shinbun. During his time Japan, he reported on the sex industry, Yakuza bosses and the relationship between the society at large and its underworld.
The interview by Fresh Air’s Terry Gross is fascination and the excerpt from the book is just as interesting.
Some people believe the Japanese fetishize technology — which could be true. But USB-powered boob warmers is more like using technology to serve your particular fetish.
But given the proliferation of saline-filled fake boobs in the valley, such a device could find use in the winter months when those puppies might get cold to the touch. Happiness is, after all, a nice paid of DDs to motorboat.
Forget gay marriage. The final frontier in convincing holier-than-though fundamentalists that the end times are near is all in the pixels, baby — and by that I mean marrying a video game. Are you sure your buddy loves World of Warcraft or does he love World of Warcraft?
